Egad! Peasants, maybe I'm not the most trusting fearless forecaster on the planet, but if you believe that Joe Pa really doesn't know what the BCS is, you're also convinced that Rex Grossman is the greatest quarterback of all time. Kaff-Kaff!

I'm guessing that the old coach has a pretty good grip on what his football team's got to do to win a national title, besides stay out of jail. Harrumph! Anyway, the Nittany Lions should beat the Hawkeyes today, although I'm guessing Captain Kirk's boys will make a game out of it. The victory should give Penn State more credibility with the BCS, the AP and the AARP. Kaff-kaff!

The Cyclones have a real chance at a victory today in Boulder, but it won't happen. I can also predict that there will be more mountain goats in the immediate vicinity than fans, given the way the mighty Buffs are playing these days. Kaff-kaff!

The Fighting Farleys meet their old friend and head coach Terry Allen today, and the march toward a conference title continues. Allen's Bears handle themselves well, though - unlike those creatures in Chicago who will get waxed by the Tennessee Titans Sunday. Harrumph!

Until Tuesday, peasants.

HOOPLE'S PICKS

Penn St. 38, Iowa 24

Colorado 37, Iowa St. 30

UNI 44, Missouri St. 28

Minnesota 21, Michigan 20

Ohio St. 27, Northwestern 17

Kansas 35, Nebraska 34

LSU 13, Alabama 9

W. Illinois 20, S. Illinois 16

S. Dakota St. 30, Illinois St. 28

Wartburg 16, Dubuque 6

TIE-BREAKERS

Total points (both teams), Penn St.-Iowa: 62

Total net yards (same game): 697