The mystery has unraveled.

Rather than use a legitimate tiebreaker to decide the South Division championship, the Big 12 Conference gave college football a grief knot.

It's ideal, really. As defined by Wikipedia, a grief knot is "not generally useful for working purposes." Beautiful. A lot of critics believe that's the best description of the system used for determining the South Division's representative in the Big 12 title game.

Oh, sure, the league's rules provided a way out of the three-way knot between Oklahoma, Texas and Texas Tech. Using the BCS standings as the determining factor, though, whipped up a storm of controversy.

Since the BCS uses the human polls as a component, the Big 12 essentially turned over the decision to people who have nothing to do with the conference and may not even care.

Letting someone outside the league determine the teams in the title game is like allowing the citizens of Guatemala to vote for President of the United States.

So here we are, staring right at a grief knot. Oklahoma may be the happiest team of the trio at the top.

It will meet Missouri in the championship game today, and most experts believe the Sooners will waltz into the BCS finale. Yet Bob Stoops has had to answer question after question about the fairness of the Big 12 tiebreaker. He had to be seeing red, not to mention burnt orange.

Texas head coach Mack Brown will probably lead the Longhorns to a BCS bowl game. While waiting for the invitation, he's taken his shots at the system. Gee, twhat's odd. A few years ago, Brown waged an Obama-worthy campaign for votes in the polls, knocking California and Aaron Rodgers out of a big bowl.

Then there's Texas Tech and that famous pirate lover, head coach Mike Leach. The Red Raiders won't get to play for a title. Leach's ship will not come in, whether it's the Jolly Roger or the Black Pearl. A plane ticket for Auburn, Ala., might look good, though. I'm sure he could get a bargain from one of our country's auto executives. They're not flying much these days.

With the title game set, Big 12 conference officials are considering a change in that three-way tiebreaker. Other models can be found. The National Football League has a list of tiebreakers for a three-way deadlock. It's about as much fun as reading the Federal Budget.

If you're truly looking for a way to unravel a grief knot that captures the imagination of the sporting public, if you want to stay away from polls and the less than popular BCS standings, why settle for something ordinary? Why use point differentials when you can be creative?

To that end, here's how I would have snapped the tie between the Sooners, the Longhorns and the Red Raiders this year.

n He always got the last word: Texas graduate Renee Zellweger uttered one of the great movie lines when she said, "you had me at hello." Will Rogers didn't attend the University of Oklahoma, but he's one of the state's most beloved figures. "I never met a man I didn't like" remains a classic quote.

Neither Zellweger nor Rogers can match Mike Leach. He once said, "I've specifically concentrated on not concentrating on this, and up to this point, I've done a really good job."

Now, if that's not the perfect quote for the mess that is college football in the 21st century, I don't know what is. Advantage, Texas Tech.

n Strange Brew: We all know how much fans love adult beverages, especially while tailgating. A survey of per capita beer consumption in the United States revealed that Texas consumes 37.4 gallons per year. Okahoma trails at 27.

Advantage, University of Texas. Texas Tech is disqualified. Off-sale liquor stores are confined to an area called "The Strip." Let me put it this way. Jimmie Johnson would have to drive his tail off to reach the parking lot before closing time.

n Purple Reign. As a Minnesota Vikings fan, this is the fairest tiebreaker of them all. Which school has made the most significant impact on my team?

Not Texas Tech. No Red Raiders have been great in purple.

Texas alumnus Red McCombs owned the Vikes and they nearly went to the Super Bowl on his watch. Then he started squeezing dollar bills so tightly, George Washington complained of headaches.

That leaves Oklahoma. I have two words. Adrian Peterson.

Advantage, Sooners.

So let's add it up. Texas Tech 1, Texas 1, Okkahoma 1.

Hmm, we may have a grief knot here.

Anybody got a coin?

Contact Jim Sullivan at (319) 291-1434 or jim.sullivan@wcfcourier.com