By EMILY CHRISTENSEN, Courier Staff Writer

CEDAR FALLS --- For centuries women have gathered for coffee or at their fences to trade recipes and battle stories from their child-rearing experiences.

They have shared their thoughts on everything from romance to politics, using book clubs as the impetus for their discussions. But rarely do the conversations turn to money. The topic often sits like an elephant in the room --- everyone has it, but no one wants to talk about what they are doing with it.

"Get over it," says Barbara Stanny, a financial educator and motivational speaker. "We'll talk about sex before we talk about money. ... Men talk about it much more freely. There is this idea that nice girls don't talk about money. There is a shame in mistakes made, and then you throw in religious taboos and you have a very confused thinking about money. "

The Women's Philanthropy Council of the University of Northern Iowa and the UNI Foundation hope to bring financial matters to the forefront during their second presentation of Power of the Purse. This year's theme, Financial Fairytales, plays off the title of Stanny's first book "Prince Charming Isn't Coming: How Women Get Smart About Money."

Other topics include wills and probate, identity theft, budgeting, using credit cards, home buying, investing basics and philanthropic giving.

"Studies have shown that women inherit the wealth of this country because they live longer, but oftentimes the older generations don't understand finances because their husbands have always taken care of it," says Diane Curtis, director of UNI Planned Giving.

Stanny admits she used to be that woman. She grew up relying on her father, the "R" of H&R Block, and then her husband, a financial adviser, to manage her finances.

"Anytime I asked for financial advice, my father said 'Don't worry, your husband will take care of it,'" Stanny says.

And he did, for awhile. But, Stanny said her ex-husband eventually gambled away her money and left the country, leaving her with back taxes totaling more than $1 million and three young daughters.

"My father wouldn't lend me the money and I wasn't going to raise them on the streets, but I didn't know anything about money," she says. "So, I had to get smart."

Stanny knows her story isn't that different from that of women across the country. She only hopes that her message, and events like this, can keep them from facing the same grim reality.

Vicki Angove, senior vice president at U.S. Bank and a Power of the Purse presenter, said people need to understand the concept of paying themselves first, no matter how big their paychecks are.

"I have been in the business 20-plus years and seen school teachers and waitresses retire as millionaires," she says.

Stanny agrees it is important to begin building one's financial acumen as early as possible; however, it is never too late. She recommends seeking out or starting a book club that focuses specifically on investments and money matters. She also says that something as simple as scanning the business headlines in the daily newspaper can be a good place to start.

"Talk about money with people who know more about it than you do," she says. "Don't just talk about how much your new dress costs, though. Talk about where you are investing your money, how much you are investing and what you are doing now that the economy has slowed down."

Contact Emily Christensen at (319) 291-1570 or emily.christensen@wcfcourier.com.

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